He probably found someone else-maybe cats can tell that you never smile and get tired of waiting for you to be a person again and not someone who only gets dressed to get the mail and groceries from the front door. I used to have a cat for a little while, I called him Fred, but then Fred ran away. The Dream Recorder™ is not my only friend in the world but it is the least demanding. I used it one whole week then decided it was way too creepy so I put it away in the closet and then forgotten about it. Hands would shoot up and wave at you, then get in your face, stretching closer with every hit of the snooze button. Before the Dream Recorder™, the last thing I bought was an alarm clock. That whole year I was obsessed with new tech. It seemed like the coolest idea ever when I bought it off Kickstarter. How did you sleep? Would you like me to analyze your dreams? And then it would start, regardless of my answer. Good morning, the Dream Recorder™ would say every morning. I would have turned its commentary off but I had been living alone for almost a year and I was so desperate for companionship that even the semblance of it was better than nothing at all. Living with the Dream Recorder™ was like living with an alien that had no ability to grasp even the most basic human traits and thoughts. Would you like to program the washing machine now? It was a tiny brook, the stream pretty shallow, but I had my head under and somehow forgot how to either hold my breath or how to pull my head out.Īs soon as I woke up the Dream Recorder™ said: Last night I dreamed I was drowning in a river I had never seen before. The more I record, the weirder my dreams get. Side-effects may include restlessness and insomnia, read the Dream Recorder™'s manual. “There's a ninety percent chance I want to kick you,” I say back to it, “so start worrying.” While I am asleep every single dream molecule is sucked into the machine, recorded and analyzed, and the second my eyes open it starts to talk, giving me its report. There is a ten percent chance that you want to beat up your boss, the Dream Recorder™ says, but I wouldn't worry about it. As soon as I open my eyes the Recorder starts to talk, which I think is a design flaw.
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